Trust Me…

Hello all,

Welcome back to my hidden cave along these beautiful, chaotic, messy shores. Thank you so much for taking the time and energy to set sail back here…I appreciate it more than you could ever know. I hope you are all doing well this week. I, myself, have had a very adventurous, relaxing, travel-filled week as I’ve been driving around the West Coast. While on these ventures, I self-reflected on quite a bit of different topics. However, one topic that I continuously found myself wondering was where my trust lies within myself and other people. Ironically, while wondering about this topic continuously throughout this last week, I also found myself having conversations with the people most close to me about this topic…which only helped realize the power we hold in trust.

What I mean by this is, when we are putting our trust into someone, or vice versa, we are completely surrendering to the other person in a peaceful manner. I see trust as a peaceful surrender because we are putting our energy and belief, which can be akin to a sense of security and confidence, into the other person…which is a big deal. However, when someone breaks our trust, the process of learning to trust them again is much more of a journey than it was to begin with. There’s so many layers you have to peel through in order to do so: from processing the betrayal and hurt, to healing from it, forgiving the person, and then slowly venturing on the path to re-trusting them…it can be a lot. One thing that is the absolute hardest during this process, in my opinion, is trying to let go of the image that has now distorted your view of the person. However, while personally going through this process with someone in my life, I have realized that sometimes, letting go of that distorted image of them can only help you see them in a more colorful way…whether it be light or dark. For myself however, I have only been seeing more of a light color which has also helped me see the light color of trust in others. I have found myself being more relaxed, sociable, and all around just more light around people now that I am slowly learning the process of instilling a degree of trust in individuals, and I’m thankful for that.

I used to lie awake and pray

For a day where you + I could reconcile

And everything could be okay.

A higher power must have heard me,

Because I was awoken today

By the sun, moon, and stars

Not expecting to find forgiveness

For you

Within my heart

Thank you all so much for reading this week’s journal. It means the absolute world to me and I hope you all enjoyed it. Make sure to check out my new poetry uploads under the “poetry” tab. Also, make sure to surf back these next couple of days for more! I hope you stay safe, healthy, and happy…talk to you soon.

With great love always,

M.H. John